Speed dating uk

Where I struggle to hold eye contact or stop grinning, they are very comfortable in themselves and with the language of the night and things we are asked to do.

I, on the other hand, have to hold back a snigger at ‘divine god’ which Guy uses to describe the men in the room. In contrast to the women, each man I lock eyes with around the circle is like a nervous ball of energy. But then, just try looking silently and directly into the eyes of a stranger and see how long you last: it’s a very exposing thing to do.

At the front its sits knee high, which turns out to be a mistake, as I have to try my best not to flash everyone during the many legs-crossed, on-the-floor exercises that come later.

Each ‘couple’ forms a ‘station’ and at each station we do an exercise together that Guy talks us through from his prompt cards, like a gameshow host. For the first one – as I sit opposite a total stranger – we’re asked to list all the things we find beautiful about the person in front of us. Another exercise has us sitting down, mirroring each other’s movements, which ends up feeling like a contemporary dance. With the next gentleman, I must now hug him and apologise on behalf of all my sisters, which he feels sincerely grateful for. Though Guy is pretty chill, approaching life talking about personal energies and meaningful connections, he’s also thankfully a New Yorker and can crack a joke.

While I ponder on what they’ve done during the lifetime of this poor chap, his body is heating up like a roaring furnace and I’m glad when I can finally let go before all moisture evaporates from my body. At the end of each rendezvous, lasting anywhere between a minute and three minutes, Guy invites us to pop one of our beads in the man’s pouch, if we are interested in talking more, while they stand with their eyes closed. It allows us to laugh at the awkwardness of it all and, perhaps, cunningly, let down our defensive walls, allowing people in and deepening the connection.

Tantra Speed Date is the latest offering from Lauren Harkness and Guy Shahar, relationship and tantra experts and founders of The Tantra Institute.

Since the first event took place in New York in May, it has spread to San Francisco and Boston — and it’ll be coming to London later this year.

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